You know what’s funny? One day your life could be going perfect, or even just fine when suddenly ‘Wham!’ you’re hit with a road block and you suddenly don’t know what to do. That’s life for you. Sometimes these road blocks happen to the people we care most about and we can’t do anything but watch it happen.

It also happens so fast that it practically blinds you. A couple days ago I got told that my godfather has thyroid cancer. I’m not much of a fighter but this is one of those times where I wish I could kick cancers ass. (Excuse my language if you happen to be young and reading this.) I haven’t seen him since I found out he had it. Now they’re saying that the cancer spread faster and farther than they thought and that he only has a few days to live.
Talk about ripping off the band-aid fast to make it hurt less (it doesn’t btw). I know I should go see him, but my mom is saying that he is saying good-bye to everyone that visits him, and I’m not sure I’m ready for that. I already tear up just thinking about it. I’m not ready…..

I honestly want to forget it’s even happening, but in reality it’s happening, whether I want to acknowledge it or not. I don’t know what to do to be honest. A part of me wants to go to see him…..one last time, but another part doesn’t want to see him. I can’t I’m weak when it comes to this sort of stuff. If he’s already saying good-bye does that mean he’s giving up? Is it bad if I haven’t given up hope? I don’t know I’m conflicted at the moment and sadly, I only have a few days to make a decision.

I really wish the doctors would be wrong and that he makes it through. It pains me I can’t even describe what my aunt and cousins are going through. (His wife and kids) He’s too young to have cancer, but that’s the bad thing about cancer. It doesn’t care who they hit or what age it hits someone.

This happened to my aunt once too. (Not the same one I’ve been talking about) but my aunt had breast cancer and now she’s not with us anymore. It’s been almost ten years, but it doesn’t make it any less painful, and now cancer is at it again. These are one of the things I wish went away.

It was only a short amount of days that they had said he had it. Now they’re saying they can’t do anything about it. I just feel like they could do so much more than what they are saying they are. I feel like they’re just quitting on us and not even trying. I know I’m being irrational and that’s not true, but that’s honestly how I feel right now. Is that a normal feeling?

I know it’s not the same at all because I don’t have it (thank goodness) but it still hurts because he’s family and my godfather, it doesn’t make it any less painless. I’m honestly trying to be strong but I’m failing miserably I’ll tell you now.
I really hope there’s a miracle that happens, but everybody that got cancer in my family never made it. But there’s always a possibility…right?

I at least have someone to talk to. Besides, you guys, which don’t get me wrong I love you guys. I have my family and my cousins to talk to as well. The ones who are going through it as well, and the ones who aren’t. It’s crazy what brings a family together isn’t it? It shouldn’t always be like that though. We shouldn’t get together only when something extreme or bad happens. For the most part though my family is close but we still have times like this where we get together if something drastic happens I’m not going to lie.

I know that no matter what happens though my uncle will not be forgotten, just like my aunt. Whether it’s talking about them and the great feeling they brought to people, or whether I’m writing it here so others can read it and be thought of, or could relate to. Either way they are being thought of. No matter what happens I’ll make sure that my nina (godmother) and my cousins are okay. I’m not letting anything bad happen to them. If I could tell my uncle anything it would be that. He doesn’t need to worry because we’ll take really good care of them. We love them all so much and we’re family, and family sticks together through thick and thin. All my life I’ve been taken care of by my parents and my second parents (my god parents) and now I think it’s my turn that I pay that back. That I take care of them now. Not just my cousins but my aunt as well.That you don’t have to worry about it anymore and that you don’t have to be strong for oursake, or theirs. I’ll be okay, and I know in time so will my aunt and cousins. You’ve always been strong and took care of the family. Now we’re taking care of you, and we have to be the strong ones. I promise uncle, I hope it doesn’t come to that and you survive, but know that they will never be alone and always be taken care of.

“People like us we’ve got to stick together, keep your head up nothing lasts forever..” -Kelly Clarkson “People Like Us”